I believe that animals are attracted to us Nethertons. Or at least the Netherton house.
Maybe they sense that we'd never kill anything slightly bigger than a mouse, with striped fur or a fluffy tail, or feathers. Somehow, they know that if we ever called a pest control company it'd be something like Enviropest.
Enviropest doesn't hurt animals. They put up those trap doors that allow an animal to escape the house, but not get back in the same way.
So this week, I discovered that some small animal --it might be two animals --has taken up residence in the interior walls of my house.
I called Enviropest.
On Friday morning, the morning of my appointment with Enviropest, my walls suddenly got very quiet. I suspect that whatever is running around in my ceiling can speak English, and so has already been tipped off.
Jeremiah --who looks and sounds just like Woody Harrellson --arrived precisely at 9 AM and parked his Enviropest truck in my driveway. We two went in search of the itty, bitty entrance that was allowing a chipmunk (I insisted it was a chipmunk) access to the inside walls of my house.
I was pretty sure it wasn't a mouse. Mice are nocturnal. This critter was active during the day and quiet at night.
Also, mice move a certain way. This critter likes to make quick, long dashes along inside channels and then scratch vigorously and for long, protracted spells. Also, this critter is probably a hybernater, since I'm never bothered during the winter.
It's a mite disconcerting when you're sitting at the dining room table, trying to eat dinner, and some animal is clawing away, unseen, just above your head.
Jeremiah climbed up on the roof and inspected every inch of the roof, the gutters, soffits. Everything.He checked the walls, the foundation, the ground. Then scratched his head and declared my house the best, most solidly built, most impervious house he'd ever inspected. There ain't no way any critter could get into your house unless they're comin' through the garage.
He didn't charge me the usual fee. Just a small fee for coming out and announcing that he couldn't install a trap to catch a phantom critter.
Later that day, I saw one of the chipmunks digging for seeds just outside my office window. I know he saw me watching him. Because he acted way too nonchalant, just like the prison inmate who's putting on the act in front of the guard. And the second I'm not looking, he'll make his move. . . back up onto my roof and into his secret entrance into my house.
Oh, that chipmunk is clever. I'm starting to dislike him.
Well, at least now my little enemy knows I'm alert and vigilant. I got that one thing going for me.
In warfare, be it civil, international or spiritual, make sure your enemy knows you know:
- who they are,
- what they are
- where they live
- where they are now
- what are their plans
- how they intend to carry their plans out
- when they intend to carry them out
- how many are their number
- what will kill or incapacitate them
- and that you are capable.
"Praise be to the Lord my Rock
who trains my hands for war,
my fingers for battle." (Psalm 144:1 NIV)
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